You meet the love of your life, and by all means, emotionally, physically, and even sexually you can feel your compatibility is at its peak.

However, their financial language, money discipline, and level of expenditure are a bit questionable. In a relationship, your partner’s financial decisions will undoubtedly affect you. 

We have seen cases where property is repossessed when one partner is unaware of the accumulated debts or strained relationships due to constant financial wrangles. 

In this post, we seek to delve into the world of relationship finances. We will define the various financial stressors and redefine how a couple can create a healthy financial system.

Understanding financial stressors in a relationship

It is estimated that financial challenges are among the top 3 leading causes of divorce in the world.

These challenges will range from the availability of funds to expenditure. It can be frustrating when one partner’s money language differs from the other’s and tension can at times arise. 

To help couples in their discussions around money, here are some negative financial behaviors to look out for, their impact on a relationship, and how to create healthy financial habits.

1. Financial Infidelity

Imagine withdrawing funds from a joint account without informing your partner, to go fund a lifestyle desire.

Or finding out in the middle of a financial crisis that your partner has a secret account with quite a lot of money. These are some very common financial stressors.

Financial infidelity is the breach of financial trust, lying, or choosing to conceal information that your partner needs to know.

Financial secrecy creates a dent in a relationship, it brings mistrust and makes it hard for partners to fully depend on each other. Rebuilding this trust can be hard as it damages emotions as well, the wronged partner will always feel like they need to watch out for themselves.

2. Unemployment and Income Disparities

Financial insecurity is a major stressor in a relationship, where one partner feels like they are not contributing much to the relationship. It makes the partner feel inferior and unappreciated.

The situation can be heightened when the partner with a much higher income keeps reminding them of their situation. There is a need to understand that a relationship is a partnership.

During hard times you should be your partner’s safe space holding them through without judgment.

3. Overspending

Spending more than what is available is the fastest way to get into debt. This is a dangerous habit and a common among the possible financial stressors.

This is a major financial stressor as it leaves you in worry and fear of lack as you have no control over your own finances.

This habit will lead to financial ruin for both partners and resentment over the bad management of funds. There is therefore need to live within stipulated budgets.

4. Accumulation of debts

Debts are major financial stressors. They are not always from overspending.

Sometimes hard times will lead to the accumulation of debt as a form of survival. Or maybe you have old debts from student loans, mortgages, or credit cards. 

There is always a fear around carrying on debts you did not acquire yourself to begin with. 

Couples should be open about all the debts they acquire, and their payment plan, and when they need help repaying, ask for help. 

It is hard to have your assets repossessed and find out your partner deferred payments on debts that were not part of or didn’t know about.

5. Unequal contribution of funds

When one partner contributes a lot more than the other, there can be resentment and too much dependence this is among the common financial stressors.

Partners need to discuss their income and come up with a contribution plan. 

This will solely be based on the dynamics of your relationship, income, culture, and other factors that could be affecting you. 

Nonetheless, It is good to note that a 50/50 contribution does not necessarily indicate fairness as in most cases you both won’t have an equal income.

You also won’t be able to ensure equality to other issues such as physical availability and chores. Hence one partner may still feel like they give more than the other.

6. Gambling and Addiction

Gambling and addiction are two problematic issues for any relationship since the addict has very little control over their situation.

It will drain your finances and the addict will mostly tend to neglect their financial obligations.

These situations will wreak havoc on a relationship as the addicts become quite unreliable financially and the situation can be constant hence it erodes trust and dependability.

To overcome addiction seek professional help, once its signs are recognized.

7. Lack of partnership

Imagine being in a relationship where everyone is concerned about their own comfort, and each partner’s financial struggles are theirs to figure out. 

This can be among the possible financial stressors as there’s an unwillingness to financially support each other.

You either believe your partner can do it themselves or you are just unwilling to discomfort yourself for your partner.

You do not discuss finances, each person is allocated their scope of bills to pay and on a couple’s activity, you split the bill. 

This system brings on a lot of reliability issues, it makes it hard to support each other or even grow together as you are unaware of your partners’ dealings. 

At the end of the day, there’s bound to be a drift because you have created a barrier that is hard to navigate.

8. Financial Control

You come to an agreement to pool your funds together, but then one partner is controlling all the finances and limiting the other’s independence even over their own funds, this is a toxic financial stressor.

This is particularly a major red flag in any relationship. It is a form of power play at financial manipulation that should not be allowed.

As a couple, each one of you should have an opinion on finances that affect both of you.

Building healthy financial behaviors

The journey to positive financial habits and the creation of wealth should be intentional, strategic, and consistent. Here are some ways to create a positive financial language as a couple.

• Communicate

Discussions around money are paramount and should be normalized as money dynamics are constantly changing. Openly discuss your income, goals, the way you spend money, and even debts.

Create a safe space where your partner can always bring on an issue of concern that may be affecting them financially. Make them feel heard and together create solutions to any financial problems as a team.

Always find a common ground and make it work.

• Plan together

Pool your funds, budget together, save together, discuss the short-term and long-term goals, and above all invest and grow together. 

Discuss your financial priorities, If you plan to go on a vacation or to buy properties, the journey will always be easier if done together. 

You can even make vision boards and create check-ins so as to hold each other accountable.

• Maintain Financial trust

Do not do what you wouldn’t want to be done to you. 

Be a reliable partner. If you have individual financial goals, agree on the personal being personal but always prioritize the common goals.

• Seek professional help

When faced with more complex issues seek help.

 You will be amazed at how much will change from a couple of sessions with a financial advisor. There is always something new to learn new budgeting tricks and more profitable investment plans to grow wealth.

In conclusion, avoid letting money erode the intangible essence of a relationship. Money can always be earned, but true love cannot always be found.

Learn more on https://bigsisterunfiltered.click/is-the-one-truly-the-one-right-life-partner/.